The Shaving Cream Racket, by Jeffrey Tucker

Shaving cream is the source of the trouble.

Why don’t people imagine this possibility? Because shaving cream seems so frothy and innocent, the glorious barrier that stands as a guard or shield between your skin and the sharp blade. The cream is our valiant protector, so surely that is not the source of the problem!

In fact, it is not our protector. Shaving cream is destroying your skin, turning it into a whining, pathetic, dependent, beaten, insipid layer of pasty pulp. Your skin has become the fatted calf that has been killed, the lamb slain on the altar, the virgin sacrificed in some ancient cannibalistic ritual of an uncivilized people.

Not sure if Tucker is a nutter or not, but I’m willing to give the baby oil trick a shot. After shaving I look like I’ve gone 20 minutes in the Octagon with Bas Rutten — a bloody mess.